Balancing Life and Medicine

From Battlefield to Business: Harnessing Resilience, Community, and Faith for Entrepreneurial Success with Stacey Ray

• Dr. DeWayne Baugus • Season 1 • Episode 2

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What happens when a decorated military veteran steps into the world of entrepreneurship? Stacey Ray shares his riveting journey from military service to owning a successful Farmer's Insurance agency, alongside his wife, Heidi. Stacey’s story is filled with inspiring anecdotes of resilience, faith, and community support. He opens up about the critical mindset shifts required to transition from the regimented life of the military to the unpredictable world of business ownership, providing valuable lessons on perseverance and the importance of never quitting.

Stacey's military background instilled in him a spirit of unyielding resilience and the value of deep, meaningful connections. He discusses how these principles have guided his approach to building relationships in the insurance industry. This episode uncovers the often-overlooked aspects of running a business, such as the importance of educating clients about comprehensive coverage and the role of trusted advisors. Stacey highlights how genuine relationships and a personal touch are crucial for success, especially in a field where misunderstandings about business ownership are common.

Navigating personal hardships like cancer and miscarriages, Stacey’s story is a powerful testament to the importance of empathy, faith, and a supportive network. His experiences underscore the value of surrounding oneself with wise and supportive individuals, balancing work with family, and finding strength through faith. Tune in to hear how Stacey's journey has been shaped by his community and how his faith provides guidance amidst life's challenges. This episode is a compelling conversation about resilience, personal growth, and the essence of community.

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Dr DeWayne Baugus:

Thank you for joining us again with Balancing Life and Medicine. We're here with Stacey Ray covering some major topics as far as where we fit in the community, how we tie into it when we face adversity, and how not to quit, to keep moving through and having God in our life, that support, that foundation, when things are going great and when they're going bad, how we grow through those with the Lord at our side, all right. With that being said, we're going to get right. Get into it, stacey. What is it that got you into insurance? I mean you're you seriously want that story? Well, I do, because the part of us that has joined together as far as being veterans, military mindset, community-driven, service-driven what is it that I mean?

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

I got out of the military and I thought how can I make the most money possible and survive? And you came out of it very different. I was single. You had a family. You still do have a family. So with that I mean you. You were thinking long-term foundations, community. Talk to me a little bit about, like what military years into farmer's insurance in that next chapter of service.

Stacey Ray:

You know, it was kind of a blended deal because you go active duty and then I also got off of active duty, couldn't stay out long, join the reserves, right, got sent over as a individual mobilization augmentee, which is basically the army could put me as an instructor wherever they wanted, nice, but as a reservist, you know, I was still. I was having to work and again, our whole thought process I think we're raised that way of just what is the thing that's going to make you the most money, right, how? And then, as a, as a husband, um, I had, you know, young kids. Um, how do I, you know, bring home the most money? What's the most stable? You know, stable is always a big deal, um, and I was in, as you know, I was in the medical um arena for a long time.

Stacey Ray:

I sold high-end digital radiography um and radiology equipment, focused mainly in the dental arena, but, but basically helped dentists and helped dental schools make more money type deal, and that was a secure type thing. But I was always working for somebody else, right? Can I take off for this? Can I go to my child's event? Can I do this type of deal? And you're always, when you're in that arena, you're always working for somebody else and the back of my mind was always um, and I'm using the word always a lot, but the back of my mind there was that thought process of I want to work for myself.

Stacey Ray:

You know, I see the entrepreneurs out there. It's scary about it. And finally, there were some things that were going on in the job that I had prior and we were praying and asking God to, you know, open doors that need to be open and close those that need to be closed. God to open doors that need to be opened and close those that need to be closed. And some of those were closed directly on my nose as I was trying to force my way through the door and I had a great friend that we had known for many years who kept saying Stacey, Heidi, you should start a farmer's business, look at having your own agency, start an agency, planting a seed, Starting. And that was the door that stayed open, right. And then another opportunity. And you know, when I say we started with a small business, I mean, if some people are given a plant, we were given a seed.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

So all the way from the root system.

Stacey Ray:

That's right you know, and we stopped. We started in as Heidi and I working together. We have worked together every day for the last nine years. That lucky lady you know has been a part of this whole thing, but that's really kind of how it started. It went from being that corporate life to wanting to have my own business and something that was ours. To God put this in our path.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

And there's a lot there to unpack too, isn't there? I mean because I know my experience coming out of the military. There was a structure, the military, there was a structure. And then you know, I got to see so many different as you did as well so many different families that came apart during that process of transitioning, and it speaks a lot to your character being able to make those transitions, put different hats on and then start to develop a business from the roots, from the seed, essentially with the family you're bringing along on this trip. I mean, your wife is amazing, your kids are amazing.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

It doesn't mean that you didn't get bumps and scrapes along the way, but there's a recovery that you guys were able to do and are always able to do. It seems like to this day. You know, with navigating life, the pitfalls of it. But the part I want to unpack is what really kept your mind in the game, because I've seen so many people pull the plug and say I don't want to do this, especially from the military, because we're hitting a brick wall and I don't think a lot of civilians understand how much structure is given to us a job, our uniform, everything's given. Our family even knows their structure is there. So to jump out of one frying pan into literally a fire troop, because the civilian world wants to tear you apart and you are focused mostly on money. You have to be, because that's the goal is to feed everybody.

Stacey Ray:

I mean, there's no fallback of moving into the barracks, right, you know it was. It was a strange. You brought up uniform and I was going to say that how weird was it, when you got out of the military, that you had to pick out your clothes every day? Oh, right, and you had to look nice, you had to fit in. You had to change that style I mean, this wavy, beautiful hair wasn't always right Every seven days. You know, you get that haircut type of thing and it is that structure.

Stacey Ray:

And then you know, as an NCO or as a a leader, you got to be ahead of the game, right, it's not that you're going to be just following along. You have young lives that are looking up to you as well, and you know it's the same thing with our business. So, um, if I didn't make it, my family don't need it. Right, if we don't go out and I think that that was the big charge of it's not that I don't want to, it's that I have to I've got to go out, I've got to learn as much as I can, I've got to start closing deals, I've got to and the fact that I really enjoyed what we're doing, because it's more of a protection thing. What I do is we protect families. I think that, carried over from a lot of this stuff, as far as I'm protecting my family, I'm protecting my friends. Same thing with, you know, military to civilian transition of we're protecting people.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

Yeah, but what I see you doing is now you're protecting, like suburbs and cities and communities. I mean because you're part of so many different networks too, right?

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

Oh yeah, I mean you got your hat and so many different things and I try to imagine because getting to see your kids grow, recently married, you know there's all kinds of moving parts in there. You and your wife have been pretty much able to go through all these changes and show your children how to do it. No one's perfect but to persevere, to keep going and also to stay plugged into a community that you know needs you. How do we balance that? I mean, like I know there's a time as an entrepreneur when you're waiting for that seed to sprout.

Stacey Ray:

And it's like come on, take off.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

This has got to go, and that pressure that you have to deliver, but yet you always. You have a love for people. It's not just people.

Stacey Ray:

It's not just people.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

It's like the community, and that also reflects a really stable marriage. It may be rocky for all of us in our marriage at times, but there's a stability there that has withstood so much change. And where do you like farmers? You started that a few years ago. Now it seems like you're running an empire.

Stacey Ray:

I wish that that was the case, and if empire is out there, that's fine. I hope that that comes. It's more along the lines of I have a great team right there is. I have a great team of other business owners right. Um, I don't buy leads, I don't do that kind of stuff. All of our growth, a lot of it, is organic by relationships. I hope that when, just like this business, right, if I was to walk in here and Dr Dart was throwing the horse needles at me and I didn't feel like I connect with you, well, why would I come back? I think it's the same thing in any business.

Stacey Ray:

You know that first year, gosh, you're just trying to put the wheels on the cart. Right, you got the plans but the cart's not even rolling. The second year, finally, you're trying to get it to roll. That third year you've got some momentum and you've got the bumps and bruises from the mistakes that you made and with my wife and now my son working with us in the agency, it was just kind of a natural progression. And, yes, there were a lot of times when we were like we were making nothing compared to what we were doing in the you know the medical uh side of things to shift. You know how do you, how do you transition from there and is it worth it? Just go get a job, get insurance and everything else that comes along, medical insurance and that kind of thing.

Stacey Ray:

But you, you know, and we prayed a lot, we had a lot of people that supported us. My friend up in Collinsville, Wilbur Lee, and Tara Tucker, were instrumental in guiding us. I was just smart enough to do what they told me to do in a lot of ways right. And we, you know, we've been blessed. God has put this in our path and I truly think that if he takes it out of our path, then we'll be successful there too. And I think, kind of going back to some of that military thing too, is don't quit, right, right, that's not an option. There's not an option. You can't quit, you don't want to quit. You've seen other people quit but I'm not going to be that person.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

That's always in the back of your mind, isn't it? To just go back and get another job somewhere else, oh yeah.

Stacey Ray:

I get offers all the time.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

Yeah, I would imagine. I mean, your personality fits so many different lanes, so many different career fields, but I think your heart is in service your way, not managed by someone else. I mean, obviously, heidi manages you, thank you, thank you, thank you so much. We all Tulsa knows. So with that, though, your heart has to be in it, and that's something I got to discuss with our buddy, nathan. Is that connection with people? Oh, yeah, and I think that that does come from military service. There's a connection that you gain with strangers, right, it's like strangers within the unit, they automatically become family, and I think that that's kind of what we're looking for as veterans when we get out, there's another family to plug into, to have a purpose when we get out there's another family to plug into to have a purpose.

Stacey Ray:

Well, didn't we do that with Little League Baseball, with high school sports? If you're doing individual sports, then that's one thing. You're leaning on your own skills or whatever. I think, when we're able to, because if you know anything about me, it's about the team, it's not me, it's not just Heidi, it's our, the people that we surround ourselves with.

Stacey Ray:

Um, when I you were talking about, uh, you take a beating every now and again because the insurance industry or any business, right, you see people at their best and helping and things have gone the absolute best. You see people in a situation where it's the worst, and sometimes it's the worst day of their lives and you're helping them through that. But it's not always the right outcome or the best outcome that they wanted. You help them through that as well and you help them through that as well. And when I do get down and take that beating, and you know me, I'm up, walking around, I'm talking.

Stacey Ray:

I don't sit down to talk on the phone. It's bugging me, even just sat here. You know me. I want to jump up and walk around and talk, but it's about the community and it's about our friends and I can call people like you and say or you know, stacy, I can sit in your eyes, what's going on? And we have those conversations. You decompress the, the punching bag gets worked over at the house quite a bit. But then you again, what else could I be doing? I'm blessed at what I'm doing, I'm thankful for what we um, for what we have and um.

Stacey Ray:

But everybody's got their bad days and we just kind of yeah roll with those punches and try to get back into it regroup, yeah, regroup and and and keep going forward with it.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

I know and there's, as we just kind of went over, there's many different things that you could do, but I don't know that I could see you shine any brighter than how you shine with your wife working with insurance. I mean, I get to see it firsthand, my wife and I. I mean you're the first one to give me the talk of oh so you've got your own business. I mean because you guys were there at that time and now everybody thinks that you're rich, the rich business owner, which is completely, you know it's upside down. You know, if you, if you, if you see a giant skyscraper, just turn it upside down, we're at the bottom of that, like um starting over. But the perspective of others looking from from the outside in is it can be dangerous. It can be dangerous for you can make you a target for the public who doesn't understand, or people who are just out there trying to take.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

And it was interesting because we've had insurance companies work with us before. But there was a lack of personal touch. In fact, I thought I knew insurance. I didn't. My education on insurance was well. Let me just say I didn't even have my notebooks for pre-K.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

As far as understanding the depth of insurance, that needs to be understood as a business owner, and you were able to take that time with both my wife and I and say, look, you guys need to be covered and this is how you do it. But you didn't just say that. You explained it. You explained the dynamics of the public, the entrepreneur, the business owner, the targets that you become and how people can sneak into your life and how actually it seems like the system is made for that. You have to have someone like you. We have to have someone like you on our team because, as a physician, there's so many things that can go wrong and people can twist things and attorneys can twist things and lawsuits can into, and then you're just like you said. You see people when they're doing great, but the next week, if they're not set up and protected by insurance by a passionate individual like yourself that's covering every basis, next week they can be gone it truly can be.

Stacey Ray:

Look at the storms that we've had over the last couple weeks here in our area tornadoes, um. In a lot of ways, you know it's um. It can be frustrating when you're um, when you're starting out and when you're getting with people and you're talking about new opportunities, especially with business and, like you said, we are the rich business owners but they don't see us taking out the trash. They don't see us trying to get the fax machine working. They don't see us. Everything else that we have to do is the nug right. Everything else that we have to do is the nug right, so the chief gnome running around trying to get everything done, you know, so that the doors can open on the business and maintain it.

Stacey Ray:

Customer service is a big deal. I think that's why you and I mesh so well along with these other things. Is it's really about customer service? How do you give somebody the type of service that you would want to in our industry? In a lot of ways, customer service is dead right. Yes, it's always the phone call.

Stacey Ray:

Hey, my name is Stacey Ray. We would like to sell you insurance. I can be five dollars cheaper than my competitor, but what is it going to cost you to save that $5 if there's an accident, what's the total amount of out-of-pocket that can be? And I had to learn that too of where are the and I use this analogy, I think even with you and Ildi is where are the gaps in the armor, right? I mean, where are those potential holes that somebody can get into and and take from you?

Stacey Ray:

And then you know what are we comfortable with? Our own potential um co-insurances, right? Or our own potential out-of-pocket expenses? Am I okay with a thousand dollar bad day because I backed into the, you know, the mailbox or whatever? Okay, I get that, yeah. But I'm not okay with a ten thousand dollar back day because I went from x amount of coverage to liability only and now I have to replace the vehicle. If you don't build that relationship with the business owner, if you don't build that relationship with the business owner, if you don't rebuild that relationship with your customer, then you don't know where their pain points are at, because you, the amazing rich guy that you are, you know you could probably just write a check for it and everything would be just fine.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

I don't know that I could do that If someone was to do something like that. My job is I am supposed to be so, like you said, customer service, bedside manner, comforting, relaxing. I use acupuncture needles every day. If I come in enraged I may hurt. No, I wouldn't hurt anybody. But that changes my touch. Touch. How are you today? You know, yeah, that's so, it's no, I don't bring that into work, but you're part of my security in my business. I don't have to think about that stuff and I know you do that for so many in the community as you bring that comfort and they can go to work and focus on them because you do what you do and I know you've got to realize the depth of that. I hope you do, but it is because of that that customer service.

Stacey Ray:

You do unto others as you want to have done to yourself, correct, and the whole golden rule. I was not always that guy. In a lot of ways it was about how can I get my next paycheck and what I need to be, and being gone from the family and traveling and everything else that went along with that. But when you start getting these gray things on the side of your head gray hair and everything else there is some wisdom that comes through. You know, maybe that wasn't as important. There is some wisdom that comes through. You know, maybe that wasn't as important.

Stacey Ray:

And seeing my son and my daughter and my wife go through the different things in their daily lives and being there with them, I'm telling you people laugh and I know you hear this too. People laugh that I work with my wife every day for the last nine years and survive married with my best friend. Right same thing with you and ildy is everything sunshine and rainbows. No, it's not, but you're holding yourself together. You're holding each other together down the path of life. And when I'm frustrated and mad, heidi goes seriously let it go, let's move on from there. And it's the same thing when she's, you know, wanting to rage about somebody else. You have that partner there to say OK, vent to me, reflect, regroup and let's, let's move forward.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

Yeah, dust yourself off and let's, let's move forward.

Stacey Ray:

yeah dust yourself off and let's keep going. Well, yeah, and I, I use, you know, that same friendship with you and with some of my other um business owners that we, you know, we, we meet with and talk to of we're on an island in a lot of ways, right in our daily lives. Um, you have said this too. If we don't have that time to come together and kind of you have said this too if we don't have that time to come together and kind of vent about some of those things or you know, the, the, the, me too, gripe type things, oh, I've seen it and we talk about customers that we've had issues with and then we laugh and we move on and we go back. But sometimes it's the like I said earlier. DeWayne, what's going on, doc? How are you doing? I can see you're tired in your eyes. What's happening If you don't have those relationships and those people in your lives, like Nathan, like some of the other people that you've talked to? We cannot make this through alone.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

No, no, alone. No, no, I want to. I want to switch directions a little bit, because that those, how those relationships develop, um, they're intricate and they get whittled down over time. You see the real relationships, the real individuals in the community and you see those that kind of drift away, but as a as a business grows and you see other people grow, cause you're growing as a community too, absolutely.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

I know when we first met each other it was over five years ago, was it Six years? Six years? Yeah, I've got way more gray since I met you, so just knowing there's more to be worried about. Yeah, prettier, that's what my wife tells me. So, anyway, she's encouraging, I love her. I'm not going to adjust for a minute yet, but as we grow in the community and our businesses grow together, what we start to see is a certain look like you said, picking each other up, encouraging each other, because we know that being surrounding ourself with those individuals is always going to keep us encouraged as well. It's that buddy check, it's, it's it's sticking in there and going I, how are you today? And I know many times you've sent me a buddy check text. And it's, it's buddy check, cool, and what you love, and don't say that word. I know based on that usually you're checking in because you need someone to check in to Very true, we reflect that.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

You're right. That's necessary, I think with the networking groups that's one of the core things I wish I could see more entrepreneurs grow out of the networking groups and become those pillars and stand alone, because they're not really standing alone. They're always coming back and tied to us.

Stacey Ray:

Well, there's a responsibility. I mean, you're several years in your business growth, yeah, and there is that fast rise. There's the plateau. Sometimes there can be a decline and then going back and refocus. But there's a responsibility in our community, like you were talking about earlier of okay, I've hit a certain point. How can I give back? Yeah, how do I reach out to other people?

Stacey Ray:

I think one of the greatest compliments you could ever have is somebody to say I see what you're doing and where you are. Can you help me get there Right? And then sometimes it's like what you don't see are all the bumps and the bruises and everything else that you have to deal with. Let's talk about getting down that path and everything else that you have to deal with. Let's talk about getting down that path and then that reach out, that hand up out of the hole when you find that opportunity to mentor and lead. If you're not taking those opportunities, I think that you will absolutely fail. Because if you can teach me as a business owner or you can remind yourself of oh, this is how I got there, that's a daily reflective of, okay, I got so good at doing that that I went on to doing something else and forgot how to keep myself going. When you teach somebody, you're reminding them and you're reminding yourself. You're teaching yourself again. How do I stay successful? That humbling.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

True, that humbling. I was discussing that with Nathan as far as how do you stay humble and that was the same kind of response he had was you have to remind yourself, you have to get back to your foundations, you have to help people grow and give back. And when it comes to business, I've had this question in my mind for probably the last. I'm short-minded, so about six minutes. So what I'm wondering is at what point did we stop having to make those cold calls? Because we went through those growths in business, we had to make those cold calls, we had to call back, we had to follow up, which we still do. But getting through that awkward phase to the point now where people are coming in, people are being referred to you because you're in the community, you're known. How long that season of growth is, I think, is really dependent on your personal character and how much you care and how much you submerge yourself into the community and your knowledge within your career field.

Stacey Ray:

I'm a crazy sales guy. I love the cold call stuff. I don't like the. I don't like the hey, smile and dial kind of situation, but I love to walk up, introduce myself to a business owner that I do not know and try to talk to them about how we can work together. Um, those little. I don't care if it's a one car auto policy. I still feel excited about closing that deal. I think one of the things that we also forget is sharing each other's victories. Right, that's a big one when you're doing great. I want to celebrate your victory Right when I know that you and Hildy have hit certain milestones in your business or changes in life, and other business owners, photographers or whomever they've hit certain milestones Celebrate their victory. That makes you feel good too.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

I think I didn't learn that and I'm so guilty of it. You've called me on it. You've got I don't know how many times you've called me on it, but it's you call me on it. You're right. When you get to those certain milestones, you get through a certain season or a certain area of growth, you're starting to get mature. You should start celebrating it and I think there's a part of me and I say this because just sharing with it, with, with whoever's listening is I'm guilty of not celebrating those victories because I'm afraid if I do that, I'm going to stop working harder.

Stacey Ray:

Oh, I get it. Yes, absolutely, and I can see that and I think because we always see that growth line doing this, yeah, and that's wrong. It's up, it's down, it's up, it's down, it's up, it's down. But if your trend is your growth, right, if your trend is moving forward, um, we laugh. You know I'm up, they see me, I'm down, type deal. It's the same thing in business you, you know we're up, we're moving, we're going forward. And then we take a little setback and then we keep going forward.

Stacey Ray:

People who say you got to give a hundred percent all the time. I don't think that that's right. I can give a hundred percent for x amount of time, right, and then sometimes I gotta take a breath. Or sometimes you get beat down a little bit and you go beat up the punching bag or run laps or call duane and that kind of stuff, but then you got to get back into it and you have to have this community of people around you saying kick you out the door, right, get out of your chair, get up, what are you doing? Don't be stagnant. Helping one another. Not be stagnant is a big deal too.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

You mean like stagnant, like running out of gas on the crate turnpike and having to call you? I don't know what you're talking about. That happened. This is my insurance guy. This is my buddy, but my truck lied to me, okay, I just want to make sure that that's clear.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

It said that there were many more miles left in the gas tank, and it was amazing because the first person I thought of was you, and not because I know you're going to make fun of me from now on, but because my wife was in the passenger seat and I needed someone who was going to show up quick. Otherwise that's detrimental for my future with her. But thank you for doing that. That showed a whole lot of character, too, in who you are, and I know you don't do that just with me. Your phone is always on, isn't it? I mean, it's always on because of your job, not not just that, because of your heart. Uh, you're plugged in. You're always listening to see and make sure that everyone that you've met is doing okay. Does does that ever? I mean, like you said, you can't go a hundred percent all the time, but you got to take those breaks.

Stacey Ray:

That's where my wife helps me in a lot of ways. She, you know, she can see it in me as well of how about put your phone on silent? How about um during these hours? Then you know people got to call twice, um, or they won't get through. You know that kind of stuff and you, you do have to have some of those limits. I'm not real good with those limits, and so I've got a teammate and she helps me through those and you know, when she has her timeframes or her issues or whatever, you know we, we work, work on that, but it really is my, my wife, it's my friends who see what's going on. It's.

Stacey Ray:

You know, that whole be still and know that be still part is difficult for me. If you know me in any way, I don't sit down really well and I do. It's selfish for me, though, doc. It is selfish for me to help you. I get a lot out of it, um.

Stacey Ray:

I've had clients call me in the middle of a crazy snowstorm because their car was stolen, trying to help somebody. I remember carl, yeah, yeah, but you get something out of it. I have that story for the rest of my life. Yeah, I will hold this gas tape thing over you for the rest of your life. But it's really. It meant a lot to me that you would feel like you could reach out and call me. To me that's a home run and I think, if I am that person, that somebody is in need and they think, man, let me call Stacy, I bet he'll be there, you're that guy, I will want to be that guy. But I want to be on that top of mind as well. I want to have that relationship with people that when there is a there's a need where they're not that I can always meet it or be there. But to be that person that people feel confident in, to me that's a victory and I get a lot out of that.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

And I want to ask a little bit deeper question. Oh, don't go too deep. I'm not that smart, I get it. We're army. I can't go that deep. I don't have too deep. I'm not that smart, I get it. We're army. I can't go that deep, I don't have that depth. But it's more of the.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

The Lord is a pivotal and he's pivotal in our lives in every aspect. I know over the years, that's always been what I've seen in you, by, by your, your example, your testimony. It's always let's listen to the Lord about it, let's take it to the Lord, let's pray about it. And I know, with what you do, the little bits that you share, you see a lot of trauma, you see a lot of tragedy, a lot of people that are broken, and what you bring to the table, I know is a testimony as well.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

You, you have a great platform, um. It's not a fun one, because it works with a community that's sometimes in devastation, but it's. It's necessary to have someone show up that um is a believer, has a, has faith, has hope, and you're shining a bright light that sometimes people are attracted to, but they may not know exactly what that is. How do you talk? Are you able to always talk to individuals about your belief system, about your faith, do you always find? I mean, obviously you have to be spirit-led in this, you can't just you know, wow, your tire fell off and your car turned into a tripod.

Stacey Ray:

Oh God did that! You know what.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

God's here for you. It's got to be a conversation piece that they're ready to hear.

Stacey Ray:

That's very, very true and sometimes you know I had to learn that over the years because and there were certain stages in my life that I wasn't confident enough to say I'm doing great because God put me in this position, that I want to be the light in the darkness. I want to be the saltiness so that people see God through me. But I had to make that reflection because I am not perfect. If you know me in any way. I fail. I have my own issues. I ask God every day to forgive me. But my first prayer when I get to my office and a lot of times I'm there early by myself is close my eyes and thank God for the business that he gave me and then ask send people to me that I can help and they'd be ready to help. But you know when, when great things happen, you know you thank God that that happened. When bad things happen, you've got God and you've got family to lean back on and if you don't, we'll help you. That's it.

Stacey Ray:

If you don't have that opportunity, you know we've prayed with some people that we know are going through some really bad stuff and it doesn't mean that this because this life sucks. I don't care what anybody says you're. We are not promised to have perfect any this or grandiose rainbows and sunshine all the time, but if our long-term thought process is I've got heaven out there waiting for me, let's get as many people to go with us, then what can you do from there? Right is not try to tell people about it, but hold yourself accountable to you. Know, I've I've made some changes in my life because of maybe I'm not showing that light that I wanted to show, and we kind of go back to that of um, when you talk to somebody, and it's a habit that you have to build, because it's not easy to say, oh, you know, I'm so blessed, and people say, oh, you're doing great, you're doing this.

Stacey Ray:

Well, god has really blessed me, or my life has been blessed. You have to make that a habit of life. Yeah, and make those changes, because most of the time we're going to go. Yeah, man, that was me, did it?

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

Did it changes, because most time we're gonna go yeah, man, that was me, did it. Well, I think that's the natural reaction. Is it until you?

Stacey Ray:

I think until you're cocky don't get me wrong, we're cocky in a lot of ways yes, I am, so with what? You didn't get to be dr duane bogus by not having talent and those kind of things well and and a lot of that was stepping into a lot of fear too.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

Oh, yes, Right, I mean, that's the valleys that we walk through. Like you said, there's a lot of tragedy out there. People are going through it and we see them. There's a reason that we can identify with them. It's because we didn't always have everything put together. We didn't always understand that there's a lesson, that there's things to learn from this. There's a testimony in the life that we have and the challenges we have. He said it's a testimony and it's a mindset too. You have to see that.

Stacey Ray:

Do you think it's? I think it's easier to talk about some of these things when it comes to our daily walk and our Christian life and that kind of stuff, when you've had those bad things. You know, heidi had cancer, we had multiple miscarriages 2019, she died in my arms for some issues, I mean. But you use those situations to relate to people who maybe haven't gone through that in the past and are now going through it. Now we have friends who have family members who are going through some really bad stuff. It's not if something's going to happen, it's when, but then how do you get through it? And then how do you use that to bless somebody else later on? How do you use your tragedy that's going on in your life to bless somebody else and help them get through that bad time?

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

I think that there's a part of your heart, you know, we know biblically your heart's changed when you believe. When you hear the word, when you hear the gospel, your heart is actually changed. You see it in people's perspective. You see it, their light starts to shine in a different way, those tragedies that they had previously become a part of their voice. And I really like that. You pointed that out, because how do you shine that light on someone when they're going through a tragedy? And I think that there's an unspoken language. I said this with Nathan. I call it heart talk. It's where someone's going through a problem and you're like you're going to get through this. I've seen this before, I know this personally. You don't want to override what they're going through. You don't want to take that from them, nor could you, but you don't. You just you want them to know that you understand because you've been in that season.

Stacey Ray:

I think we fail sometimes to think that we have to come up with the right answer, right, right. When somebody's like you know, I've had a heart attack, I'm going to have to have a triple bypass, I'm having to do all these other kind of things, I want to come out with some nice little quip and easy saying of ooh, everything's going to be just fine, right? Well, it may not, that's right. It may not, and sometimes you need to let people vent through their problem and talk through their problem. Yes, it's a bad situation, yes, there is a potential bad outcome.

Stacey Ray:

So what? That's where you go back to that Ephesians chapter 6, where we're talking about the helm of salvation. If I have heaven, knowing that heaven is waiting for me, if you were to pass away tomorrow, I would bawl and cry my eyes out because I'll miss you, but I'll also rejoice because I know where you're going, I know what's going to happen. I think we kind of fall back, though, on those answers of you know something really bad is happening and I've got the right thing to say. I don't always have the right thing to say. I know I don't either. You know something really bad is happening and I've got the right thing to say. I don't always have the right thing to say.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

I know I don't either, you know, with patients that come in?

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

I don't. I've searched for it. What's the right combination? Sure, but it's not there. The only one that can actually give you that right combination is the Holy Spirit, his timing at that right time. But there's a little bit of wisdom that comes along with not having the right answer. Sometimes silence is the best answer, or just being there. That's a hard thing for me too, isn't it? Yeah, I mean, you can ask my wife. I never shut up. I'm trying to find the words all the time, but it doesn't work. I'm learning that. But we grow right. I'm learning that. And many times when I'm out of words, we have individuals in our life that take our breath away with what they're going through. It's traumatic. They're individuals that we see as a part of the fabric of our community and sometimes all we can do is reach out and hold their hand.

Stacey Ray:

You know, look back into some of the bad times that you've had in your life and some of the things that people have said that they were truly in their heart trying to say the right thing. It was just a train wreck when Heidi was going through cancer. There was some things that we had heard from very close friends and we were like some things that we heard from very close friends and we were like, go back and listen to what you said. Is that truly what you mean? Is that truly where we want to? But there again, we're trying to give a good answer and you also, when you're going through those bad times, you have to have that open heart of these people are trying to be good. These people are trying to help us out yeah, we all fail at that, don't we?

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

come on, we do. Well, is there anything, any advice that you would give? As far as being a business owner, being a family man, what are three good things that you could give to a young family member and someone who's starting their own business? They've got a child on the way. How would you I mean, you have your children are.

Stacey Ray:

Mean and ornery kids, these crazy kids. Yeah, you're right, they're vicious.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

So sweethearts, the one of them, anyway. The other one is just awesome. Like crazy kids yeah, you're right, they're vicious. So, sweethearts, one of them, anyway. The other one is just awesome Acts like a mama. Yeah, that's right, heidi, I'm sorry. So what kind of advice would you give to an entrepreneur, a young person with a family that's getting started?

Stacey Ray:

Ask God every morning to bless you and thank God every night for those blessings that he sent Number one every day. You've got to do that and again, keep that in your mind. Don't quit when you start a business. If you don't give yourself three years and give yourself the ability to fight through everything that goes on for three years, I'm not making any changes. I'm not doing anything crazy. I'm not buying crazy capital stuff.

Stacey Ray:

Give yourself three years to get your business and give you the experience to be a business owner, cause it's difficult when you jump out as a new entrepreneur. It's difficult. And then three, surround yourself with people who are smarter than you and who want to help each other get through life. If you don't build that team of other business owners or other professionals in whatever you do I don't care if you're selling vacuums door to door find the most successful person and emulate what they do. Just be smart enough to listen to what they say Great advice, or dumb enough to do what they tell you they do. Just be smart enough to listen to what they say Great advice, or dumb enough to do what they tell you to do.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

There's always that. There's always that. Well, thank you. Thank you for your time today. I appreciate you giving me the opportunity.

Stacey Ray:

You're an amazing person. This is a pretty cool setup.

Dr DeWayne Baugus:

Well, I've got to learn from you it's pretty cool, and what you do your family. You, it's pretty cool and what you do your family. You guys are a great testimony for the community too. I appreciate that. Thank you, my pleasure. Till next time.

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Dewayne Baugus

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